Is Self Care Selfish?

Ask yourself this - how often do you take care of yourself? Like, really take care? You spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year being a mummy (and in my case, a wife too), taking care of your tiny (and big) humans. You make sure they’re clean, fed, watered, entertained, happy and loved. How often do you do that for yourself…?

Pre pregnancy I did not give a second thought to running a bath at 5:30pm every Friday, and enjoying the bubbles with a book and a glass of red for an hour. It de-stressed me from my week at work and started my weekend nicely. Now, I’m lucky if I do this once every 6 weeks. Because I tell myself it’s just selfish.

Picture the scene. Last night I had a big shop in the kitchen that needed unpacking and putting away. I had a load of washing in the machine from the night before. The living room looked like Toys R Us had exploded in there, and E was having his tea. I turned to K and said, “I’d love a glass of red and a bath right now.” When he questioned why I didn’t go I told him there was too much to be done and it was selfish of me to go and do that. Before I knew it, the bath was run for me, the glass of red stood on the side, and I was sent upstairs to relax. K said, “if you can’t have a bath and a glass of wine, what has the world come to?!” I still felt guilty. I went and got all of E’s bedtime stuff ready whilst the bath ran to try and make myself feel less guilt about leaving everything that needed doing downstairs.

An hour later I was chilled, warm and so grateful to K. The things I’d left not done - he did whilst I was upstairs, with a little help from E…!

Today, whilst E napped and K took some time for himself, I went and had a Rose Quartz Facial. I was out of the house for 1.5 hours and I’ve never felt so relaxed. Southport ladies - look up Sharon at the Dairy Holistic Hub, she’s incredible. She never fails to calm me right down and make me feel like a goddess in the process. What a woman!

My point is that just because we have these tiny humans depending on us now, does NOT mean that we don’t deserve some self care too. And just to clarify, self care is not:

• Going to the supermarket alone!

• Going to the toilet alone!

• Showering in peace!

Self care is for you. To help you to feel more calm, happy and relaxed. Something you enjoy and get fulfilment from - something that makes you feel like you again. Even if it’s just 10 minutes a day - do something that is just for you.

As I said to a friend recently, you cannot pour from an empty cup. Our tiny humans need us, but they need us to be happy and healthy and able to meet their needs.

So Mama, what self care are you going to do today…?